The Heart of Adultery
Nick Jenkins
Sunday Morning’s Message – 27th September 2026
Theme:
Jesus teaches that adultery begins in the heart, challenging us to guard our thoughts, desires and relationships rather than simply trying to avoid the outward act. As we follow Jesus, we are called to flee from sexual immorality, establish healthy boundaries, pursue purity and remember that through His grace there is always a way back to freedom and restoration.
Leader Guide:
Please choose what best suits your group and fits the time well. You do not need to discuss every question. Create your own questions that fit your group. Choose two or three areas to discuss.
Have fun, Jesus people!
Connect group Discussion
Read together Matthew 5:27–30
Opening
Jesus takes the commandment against adultery beyond the outward action and brings it to the heart. He teaches that sexual sin often begins long before a physical act—through what we allow our eyes, thoughts, imagination and desires to dwell on.
Jesus is not saying that temptation itself is sin. We cannot always control a passing thought or moment of attraction, but we can choose what we continue to look at, think about and allow our hearts to dwell on.
1. Guarding Our Hearts
Jesus says that a person can commit adultery “in his heart.” This challenges us to look beyond simply asking, “Have I crossed the line?” and instead ask, “What am I allowing to grow in my heart?”
Read together Proverbs 4:23:
Discuss questions:
What is the difference between temptation and deliberately entertaining temptation?
What are some things that can gradually influence our thoughts and desires?
How can we guard our hearts in a practical way?
2. Small Steps Matter
The sermon highlights how affairs can develop through a series of small steps—dissatisfaction, attention, growing intimacy, fantasy and eventually weakened boundaries. Often, people don't intend for things to go that far, but small compromises can gradually lead them there.
Read together - Hebrews 12:1
Discuss:
Why do you think small compromises can be so dangerous?
What are some warning signs that a friendship or relationship is becoming unhealthy?
How can we establish healthy boundaries before we find ourselves in trouble?
3. Flee, Don’t Flirt
Jesus uses strong language about removing an eye or hand that causes us to sin. He is showing us that following Him may require us to make serious choices about what we allow into our lives. (please do not remove your eye)
Read 1 Corinthians 6:18:“Flee from sexual immorality.”
Read Proverbs 5:8:“Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house.”
Sometimes wisdom means removing access to something that continually pulls us towards sin rather than seeing how close we can get to the boundary.
Discuss:
What does “flee” look like practically in our lives?
Are there things we sometimes need to remove or change to protect our spiritual lives?
How can we help one another pursue purity without shame or condemnation?
4. There Is a Way Out
Temptation is something we all face, but God does not leave us powerless. He provides a way to resist and walk in freedom.
Read 1 Corinthians 10:13:“God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out.”
Read Psalm 119:9:“How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word.”
Discuss:
What “way out” might God provide when we are being tempted?
How does God’s Word help us live with greater purity?
What practical habits can help us stay close to Jesus?
5. Freedom, Not Condemnation
Jesus does not condemn us or leave us trapped in our past. He came to set people free. Wherever we have failed, crossed boundaries or allowed sin to take root, we can come back to Jesus, receive forgiveness and begin again.
Read 1 John 1:9:“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
Discuss:
Why is it important to remember that conviction is different from condemnation?
What does it look like to bring areas of struggle honestly before Jesus?
How can we encourage someone who feels they have gone too far?
Closing Thought
The same Jesus who spoke these challenging words in the Sermon on the Mount is the One who went to the cross for us. He loves us, wants the best for us, and desires that we experience freedom and healthy, committed relationships.
Read Hebrews 4:15–16: Jesus understands our temptations, and because of Him we can “approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace.”
Pray Together
Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal anything that needs to change, strengthen your boundaries, guard your heart and help you walk in purity and freedom.
Notes:
